Hello dear readers!
So no, I have not hooked up with Mr. New yet. I know what you're saying...Wimp!

And yes, I am a wimp. I'm a wimp who's gonna get filled with cock.  Real Man's cock, not just some little thing like what's between my legs. I've gone too long.  Years.  And now I've got a long weekend all to myself.  To do what I want, to do what I need to do.  I'll have about 74 hours to suck and fuck as much as I possibly can.

Now of course,  Mr. New is gonna get first rights to my mouth and my pussy.  That's right, he's been patient and he's been good and now it's his time to be bad. I know I could call him up right now and say "Please meet me anywhere, I have to have your cock in my mouth" and in less than an hour I would be breathing into his pubes.  But I only have to wait a little bit longer, just over a week.  I just dropped a few hundred on a half dozen new dresses, some tops, skirts and of course so hot shoes and boots with no heels under 4 inches.

My weekend will start at 4pm Thursday and I will be right into the shower to shave down to make my legs and body as sexy for him as I can.  Out of the shower for lotions, makeup, nails.  This gurl is gonna be ready to go.  Let's not forget my little safety device the CB6000s to keep my clit in check!  By the time I'm done it'll be somewhere between 5 and 6 and it'll be dark out.  Thank you winter.  Then comes the next fun part, getting dressed.  Lingerie, clothes, heels, jewelry and perfume.  And then the moment I've been dying for and dreading.  I'll be calling him.   Maybe I'll call him before I get dressed.   I can't even explain how horny I get as soon as I lock my clit down.  It's like hitting a button in my brain that says "Beg for it now".

  So calling him, locked up and well on my way to making myself pretty for him is a great start.

 Putting on a skirt, sexy top and heels, and then walking out the door to my car is like dipping my toe into the water of a deep deep lake. 

Driving across town, dressed to fuck,  to a meeting place that he chooses, not me, whether it's a secluded parking lot or a motel will be like wading into that deep pool.  Allowing the dark waters to surround me, changing my skin from dry to wet, changing me.

   I imagine if he'll have me, he'll want me to meet him at a motel, but maybe we can just first get to sit together somewhere.  I want to park my car a space from his and see his face when I open my car door and put my high heeled foot out and let him enjoy a leg that will go on forever.  I can't wait to stand up for him to see all of me, saunter to his truck and climb in the passenger side, letting my skirt hike up as I get in the seat.  Sitting next to a real man again and getting to say, "May I please suck your cock?" to his face and having him allow me to unbuckle his belt and reach into his pants to pull out all manhood,

 Will be like getting ready to dive underwater and hoping you remember how to hold your breath. 

Pulling out his cock and lowering my head and opening my lips to take him into my mouth will be the final plunge below the dark waters.  I will close my lips around him and savor his masculine power and be reborn with the first drop of semen on my tongue as his whore.

Well we haven't met yet.  But we may next week.  Any moment I have where I have some quiet time, my brain and my hormones are fixated on meeting him.  I've thought of hundreds of things that might happen, but you never really know until you're with someone.  What I do know about him,  he's younger than me (almost 9 years), taller than me by a couple inches (until I put heels on).  He's got me by about 50 lbs and based upon the photo I've seen, his cock is almost twice as long as my little thing.

So, I'm trying to keep my schedule available (which is never easy for me).   Then I want to be femme presentable for him but be able to clean up quick for the rest of my day when we're done fooling around.

Of course, for all I know, I'll have more to remove than just makeup!

Now here I am, years (and a couple of minor hookups) later.  I've got a new man I've been talking to and think I'm going to meet next week.  He's into girls like me and has been ready to feed me his cock for a while.  I've held off mostly because it just hasn't been convenient with the rest of my life.  But I'm craving something in my life lately and he's offering me to get as much of it as I can handle.  Do you know that it is?  I'll give you a few hints....

I know you're reading this (sorta), comment, give some feedback, good, bad, mean, nice, anything!!!

So were were together for a few months off and on.  Not very long when you think about it but I did love his big cock in my pussy.  Sex was always at my place, and that was a double edged sword.  I liked being at home and being able to dress and change outfits on the fly, but I also wanted to get out a bit.  I wanted to go sunbathe by a pool (and then have sex).

 Or go to a movie (and suck him in the theater).

Or maybe the beach

But he preferred my place, and my couch to take what he wanted and give me what I needed.

In the end, he wasn't very creative and we just stopped seeing each other.

To say I was surprised is an understatement.  Him going down on me honestly had never entered my mind.  And yet here I was laying back luxuriating in his oral pleasure.  Of course, it didn't take long to make me a whining writhing bitch.  I couldn't take much and I needed his cock more so I took a little control and went back to sucking his cock which had softened a little.  I wanted that thing HARD. 
Back to cocksucking for me and I was moaning and stroking him because I was a girl with a mission now.

I worked that cock and got my guy hard in no time.  He was humping my face and I was playing with my clit, but I had a need for something deeper.  "I want you to fuck me baby" I said to him, saliva trailing from my mouth to his cock.  His eyes grew wide and he paused for a moment, and smiled.  "Good, because I want to fuck you so bad."  I excused myself for a moment and minced upstairs to my bathroom.  I had lubed myself in advance, but I wanted to makes sure there was plenty up there because he was big and I was determined this was gonna be good.  I lubed up my pussy some more and brought the tube down with me and found him on the couch again, keeping his cock hard, stroking.
I walked up to him, leaned over and took his cock in my hand gently, kissed him on the lips and said "Come on".  I squeezed out a glob of ky and got his hardon nice and slick.  I then pulled him off the couch and turned around, kneeled down and put my ass in the air and spread myself wide open for him.
He got down off the couch and got down behind me and caressed my ass as he pulled up to my pussy.  I felt the the head at my pussy and then he pushed and the tip was in.  It didn't take long with how much lube I had in me and how worked up he was, to soon have that thick cock all the way inside me.   And yes, friends, he was bareback all the way and it felt sooooo good.    It didn't take too long, and I couldn't believe it but soon he was sliding that meat in and out of my pussy.  Grabbing my hips with both hands and taking everything I was and using it with his cock.

How long he fucked me for I can't remember, but it was a bit and then he came in me and made me his girl. 

It was the first time a real man had fucked me, and the first time one had come inside me.  I can't say I didn't freak out a bit after he had gone that night, but it wasn't long before I was calling him up again to come over for more sex.  I was his girlfriend and it was pretty sweet.

So I'm sucking Dan's cock. He's on my couch, naked, laying back.  I'm on my knees, bra half on, no top, skirt a mess, heels on (good girl!) and am holding onto his long thick cock as I bob my mouth and throat on it. He occasionally puts his hands on my head as we take turns either me sucking and swallowing his cock or him fucking my face.  I'm no expert, but I'm learning to be a good cocksucker and this guy's cock is one to learn on.

This goes on for awhile and he's not complaining, I'm enjoying myself bringing him close to the edge, tasting the cum on the tip of his cock, swallowing as much of it as I can. And then he takes me off of his cock, leans me back, pulls down my panties and takes my clit in his mouth.  I'll do anything for him now.

We were like two teenagers on that couch.  I was enclosed in his grasp. He was kissing me, feeding me his tongue.  His hands grabbing my ass as my skirt hiked up in our heat.  His cock was straining in his jeans and I was humping his crotch in heat.  Any scrap of self control was gone for me, I was his girl and was responding to his every touch without any other thought than to what felt good and what was giving him pleasure.  He rolled us on the couch and took me over from being on top of me. With his thighs, he parted my legs,  and lowered himself onto me.  Any chance of escape for me was gone, and I wanted him there on top.  Now I was his girl and he made sure I knew it.  He really pinned me with his weight, kissing me, feeling me, grinding his cock into my crotch. He paused for a moment, taking off his shirt (god he was hairy) and pulled my blouse over my head leaving me in my bra and skirt.  He attacked me again, kissing my neck and then moving down to my little breasts.  He pulled a bra cup aside, exposing my nipple and feasted on it.  Too much!  His mouth on my nip, licking, sucking and biting was destroying my brain and locking me into bitch mode.  Gasping and moaning, I held his head to my breast, wrapping my legs around his pulling him into me more.  Every lick he made, every time he pulled my nipple into his mouth and sucked it erased more of my mind and made me writhe for his attention.

 I couldn't stand it and plunged my hand down between us, I needed to feel his cock more personally.  His jeans were in my way, but I found the top button and ripped it open to get to his heat.  It didn't take but a second, because his cock was hard and pointing straight up and it was then in my hand. A streak of precum glazed my palm but I needed more and began to gently pull on him.  He lifted his hips and I was able to slip my other arm free and unzip his jeans, exposing his boxers and my other hand at work.  He pulled down his jeans and his boxers exposing his cock, fully, all 8 inches of white thick goodness and I took it in both hands and really began to play with it fully.  
He got up and sat back on the couch again, opening his crotch, his jeans around his ankles and I reached out again for his cock, I couldn't stay away from it to save my life.

Sitting at his side, we continuted to make out with me stroking his cock and him playing with my breasts.  I could feel an increasing urgency in his kissing with each caress of his dick and wasn't surprised when he guided me off the couch to kneel in front of him.  I was on my knees, my hands on his thighs, pulling his jeans all the way off, over his ankles.  His cock was pointing straight up, red and angry.  I looked up into his eyes and he stared back for a moment.  Then he just nodded to me, giving me permission and I instinctually leaned forward to his throbbing meat and guided it to my lips.  His cockhead at my mouth, I opened for it and took him in, slowly and carefully, looking straight up at his face as his eyes closed with bliss. I began to suck his cock.  No thinking, no regretting, just his cock in my mouth, on my tongue.  I was sucking his cock, and nothing else existed.

We made out in the hallway, his size overpowering my body.  He was all over me and i let him take what he wanted. His rough unshaven face grazed mine as he pushed his tongue into my mouth. I sucked it in wrapping my own tongue around his in surrender.  I could feel his cock growing in his jeans as he pressed my body against the wall with his, and I wrapped a leg around his to pull him in closer. My arms were wrapped around the back of his neck as we desperately kissed each other.  He began to grind against me, his manhood insisting itself through his jeans and the thin nylon of my skirt.  We broke for air and I took the moment to invite him inside.   I slipped under him and up the couple steps to lead him into my home.  Dan followed closely behind me, my heels clicking the floor through the kitchen, the dining room and into the living room.  I took his hand and led him to the couch and asked him to get comfortable while I got him a drink.   He sat down and relaxed on the couch leering at me as I spun on my heels and went back to the kitchen.  Glancing over my shoulder, I saw his eyes all over me as he stretched out on the couch, legs spread.
My legs were shaking and a shiver went through my body as I reached in to the refrigerator getting him a beer and pulling out an open bottle of wine for myself.  I paused a moment to gather myself.  Any thought of bailing wasn't even a consideration, I was gonna give this guy whatever he wanted and enjoy every second of it.  I returned to the living room and he tracked my every mincing step to him leaning over to hand him his beer he took it with one hand and leaned forward again kissed me taking the strength out of my legs. I almost fell on him as he somehow put his bottle aside and got my wine glass out of my hand too.  I was on top of him now, with his hands all over me, devouring his kisses.

Somehow, I got control of myself for a minute and did stop.  I asked him, if we could continue this another time?  With his cock thick and full from my attention, I'm sure it wasn't easy for him, but he agreed.  He took me back to my car, we said our goodnights and he drove off.  I went home myself and played with myself to cum.  Took off my makeup, took a shower and went to bed.
So now I'm a girl with a potential second date.  What do I do? Wait like an idiot.  It took me a while, and I don't remember how long, but eventually I found myself getting in touch with Dan again.  I had his number, I called him.

Now remember, I still had the majority of my life as a guy and I rarely remember a time when I would get a phone call at night from a girl hot to hook up with me.  So here I was, in my panties and bra, dialing the number of this guy who was definitely into me.  He answered cautiously, probably not recognizing the number.  I said "Hey, it's Beth, remember me from the other night when we drove around?"  Of course, he said, he couldn't forget. "I'd really like to see you again if I could" I said. Anytime he replied.  "How about tonight?" I asked.  Absolutley, he replied.  What time?  "How about in an hour or so?" I told him and gave him my address.   What the hell have I done?!

I've never invited a guy to my house and yet here I am, horny like mad and he's gonna be here in an hour!  Only one thing to do, get my makeup on!

Well that didn't take too long, and after a few wardrobe changes, for girly, to sexy, to slutty, back to sexy and the sluttier.  I was ready for him, my heart pounding and my clit throbbing.  I don't have a picture for you but I did look hot, that I remember.
Dan pretty much arrived on time, I could see him pull up to my house and park out front.  He got out of his truck, I headed downstairs to get the door for him.  I made my way carefully in my heels, running in 4" heels is not a good idea.  Besides, I was going to remain a lady for a few minutes more right?  The doorbell rings.  I stop for a moment and gather myself. I go to the remaining stairs and open the door for him. 
He's there in jeans, a polo shirt and ballcap, its warm (mid summer)  and he's already a little sweaty.   I am wearing a sheer navy blouse, black satin skirt, and 4" black pumps and he steps in and looks me over in the light from the outside houselight.  "You're gorgeous" he says and I melt.  Even in my heels, and I'm a tall girl,  he's got a couple inches on me in height.  He reaches for me with both hands, pulls me to him and leans in.  I'm small in his arms and looking up to him, I let my eyes close as he moves forward to kiss me.  I don't see it when it happens, but his lips meet mine and I surrender to his kissing, accepting and returning.  I hold onto him in weakness and desire as he controls my body with his size.  How long we made out, kissing and feeling each other in that hallway, I don't remember but it lasted forever and that was only the beginning of the night

So now I'm in my 20's and I'm working and I've got my own place.  What's a gurl to do?  Find a man.  I wasn't really out or anything like that.  I didn't live as a gurl, and only was being femme part time when the mood or urge struck me.  But I did know that there was something I needed to finally try and there was only one place to get it.  Between a Man's legs. So I tried the chatlines and personal adds.  Not much at first but I did end up hooking up a couple of times with much older guys.  The first, wasn't very good and a little creepy for me.  He had clothes for me to wear, which were more for a young skater boy than a skater boi.  He tied me up to a bed spread eagle and played with me a while before undressing himself and straddling my chest to feed me his cock.

It was short, not very sweet and I was out of there, chalking it up to experience. 

It was a while again before I met up with the next man.  He too was much older than me and totally pervy in hot older man way.  At least he wanted me to be a girl with him so that was a plus.  He had an apartment nearby and I came to him, half femme, some makeup on, a skirt, heels, top.  Damn, I guess I was more girly than I gave myself credit for.  Anyway, he liked what he saw and was gentle and seductive.  After a glass of wine I was in his bed, in my panties and bra with his cock in my mouth.  He played with my clit and gave it some attention and was caressing me and treating me like his little girl.

We rolled around in his bed for a while, sucking, licking and kissing.  He came, I didn't.   I did find it pretty hot and exciting to finally have a man treat me like a girl though and that was worth it all.   I hadn't crossed the ultimate threshold yet, but I was dipping a painted toenail over the line for sure.

It wasn't too long before I met Dan. We met on a chatline and had some hot sexy talk and came to the conclusion that he liked girls like me and I needed to get some more cock.  First we met in a parking lot, he had a pickup and I showed up in a little skirt and heels (like a good girl).  I climbed up and in and he drove me around town while we made small talk.  He liked how I looked and was sweet about how femme I was for him.  After a bit, I couldn't take it anymore and had to see what was going on.  I asked him if I could touch his package and he agreed.  I reached over and laid my hand on the crotch of his jeans as he drove.  I could see his eyelids droop a little as I started to pet him.  One thing for certain, it was bigger than anything I'd seen or felt before.    Being the dirty slut, I wanted more, of course!  I started rubbing and petting him more and feeling his cock through the jeans, but it wasn't enough.  So I reached for the button of his jeans and he pushed his hips out and I unbuttoned them and quickly had the zipper down too.  My hand dove into his boxers and the heat coming out of his crotch was amazing.  But not as amazing as the 9 inch and thick cock I soon had my hand on.  He liked that a lot.  No we were driving around, his arm around my bare shoulders and my little hand pumping his cock.  I wasn't ready for more, but damn I could barely stop. 

I'm starting this blog as part diary and part confessional and all truth.  I am a sissy.  I am a cocksucking, dick riding pussy.  I have not always been this way, at least not for the first preteen years of my life.  Not that I was a little nymphette (although maybe I was, sorta). 

My first memory of being feminine, was of it being forced upon me.  I was somewhere between 8 and 11, it's quite some time ago so forgive the less than exactness of my memory.  I remember getting in an argument with my older sister (some 8 years older than me) and her chasing me with a bottle of "Love's Baby Soft" perfume.  I know she sprayed me and teased me and then soon had me pinned and was applying lipstick to my young lips.  What started it, I can't remember.  But I do remember that soon after I was sneaking off to the bathroom to try on her swimsuits, then pantyhose and dresses.  A switch had been "turned on" in my young brain, and it has been a transforming experience since.

Into my early teens, grade school, 7th grade, 8th grade.  Panties, bras, skirts and dresses became an obsession for me. Then makeup.  I wanted to look as pretty as the other girls in school.   Where was the internet to help me learn?  15-20 years away.  Trial and error, masturbating furiously to being a pretty young girl. 

It wasn't long before I discovered a dildo in the house and then I did like all good girls do, I learned how to suck it and take it in my tiny pussy.  Not that I didn't try all sorts of other things like vegetables, hairbrushes etc.  Once I got a hold of that cocklike toy and could behave like a girl should, it was over.  Schoolgirl skirts, kneesocks, slinky dresses, I couldn't get enough and I was rewarded everytime I dressed up with a little cummy from my clitty.

High school passed with various additions and purges of wardrobe but it wasn't until after college that I had the true freedom to become the girl I wanted to be.   I dated girls and eventually had sex with them and loved it, but I also wanted to be the girl, badly, and have a hot guy to make out with and give myself to.

I never did hook up with a guy before my 20's